One quarter of teenage girls in the U.S. have an S.T.D. [NYT] “The national policy of promoting abstinence-only programs is a $1.5 billion failure [...] and teenage girls are paying the real price.”

Human, all too human? [NYT] New York Governor Eliot Spitzer linked to a high-end prostitution ring. Stay tuned for devastating puns.

Nazi Gold! But perhaps no Amber Room, though.

Apparently, we all missed the Third Annual International Indoor Bunnock Tournament. Bunnock? Yes, bunnock. It's bunnock, ok?

St. Patrick's Day falls during Holy Week this year. Some St. Paddy's Days have been moved to March 14th, others not. Check your local listings. more inside

Beautiful plumage? A Stackwatcher's guide to plume types and smoke density grades (as applied to the Hammer).

Man destroys Stradivarius in a fit of slapstick.

Roy Scheider dead at 75. Jaws, French Connection, Naked Lunch, 2010, Klute, Marathon Man...

Q-Tips: the Touch of Death.

Jerome Kerviel, hero to the Dilbert generation? The French fraudster has become an internet phenomenon and hero to some. more inside

Curious George and his lawn darts. Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course they're dangerous. But you knew that, and it's not like you played Catch. Assuming you're not subject to a ban -- though you can still buy dart parts (*wink wink*) or buy them legally, or even still have them in the basement -- would you ever play with lawn darts again? Would you let your kids?

Beauty Queen rejected as pageant judge. Stephanie Conover, the reigning Miss Canada Plus, has been rejected as a judge of the Miss Toronto Tourism contest, on the basis that her hobby of reading Tarot makes her a witch.

Aaaaaay! Milwaukee to erect a life-size, bronze statue of Arthur Herbert Fonzarelli.

Gary Coleman's pants sell for $400K. He needs the money for kidney dialysis. Now can you guys get socialized health care?

Louis de Cazenave, dead at 110. France's oldest WWI veteran has died, leaving just one more -- the same as for Canada, Germany and Turkey. The UK, U.S., and Australia have three, and Italy two. Some striking comments in the obit.

Happy Smurfday! The Smurfs kick off their 50th anniversarsmurf this year, with a new tv series, 3D movie, and of course, comics. It'll be just smurfy! more inside

That's OK, it's a rental.

Too Indigent To Quit? MC Hammer is back, grabbing a hold of that new "internet" thing, taking on YouTube with a dance video website (coming soon -- get your videos ready!). more inside

Curious George: running down the clock. Right. So it's the last work day before Christmas (assuming you're not in a Vietnamese sweatshop or something), and MoFi's closed on the weekend, so here's your opportunity to shoutout to all your fellow simians, and wish them a happy holidays! (Oh, and a token Christmas link, to boot.) more inside

Caruso, Melba to release new recordings, overcoming obstacle of being dead. Time capsules buried in the basement of the Palais Garnier opera house in Paris, and containing recordings of the two giants, are about to be opened up and made available to the public.